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Human sociability pre and post-COVID-19

Human sociability is a fact of common experience. Since prehistoric times, the social appears as a characteristic of human life that implies union and coexistence in order to survive.

There are many evidences of the fact that human beings live and coexist in society, but what is the origin of this human sociability? Basically there are three theories that give an answer to this question:

  1. The contractualist theory, defended by Locke, Rousseau and Hobbes. The latter considered that «man is a wolf for man» where human nature is essentially selfish and antisocial that joins a group for individual interest.
  2. The naturalist theory, with Hegel as one of its greatest exponents, who defended that it is an evolutionary process of reality (in matter and in spirit).
  3. The theory of the social nature of the human being, also known as the theory of natural law Supported by Aristotle and Thomas Aquinas, among others, it states that human nature has in sociability one of its essential characteristics and that, therefore, there is a natural need, not individual as Hobbes defended, to live in society.

Since no one has been able to prove, but simply to theorize, the selfish, antisocial or asocial character of human nature, it does not seem that the birth of sociability is due to mutual consent among men, but rather to an imperious inclination of nature and an inescapable need for the vast majority of humans.

Moreover, many psychological studies show that human beings not only need to receive from others, but also to be able to give, communicate, share, touch, embrace, etc.

During the period of confinement this need has been denied to us, not only because of the satisfaction of our material and spiritual needs, which could not be satisfied in solitude, but, more profoundly, because of its own perfection and fullness, which communicates and expands in mutual understanding and friendship.

We Spaniards are characterized by being affable, loving and highly social, always ready to pitch in when we are needed, to give two kisses to a stranger when he is introduced to us or a big hug to a friend when he sees him.

Now we are asked to relate to each other from a distance of two meters and, surely, in the short term, there will be a change in behavior and we will obey, not so much by imposition, but rather by the fear of the possible contagion of a virus of which we still do not know much.

This reminds me of that photo from 1987 when the late Princess of Wales shook hands with an HIV patient at Middlesex Hospital in London to help dispel some of the stigma surrounding the disease in those years.

But I suspect that the initial fear of the virus and the repulsion for personal contact will disappear in time, sooner rather than later, and that we will return to the way of relating to each other that we are so accustomed to and that we carried in our social imprint.

But I am also convinced that this confinement will have served many people to reflect on the kind of relationship they had with society before COVID-19, both professionally and personally; on what they have really missed during this deprivation of sociability; and on how they want to live it and with whom from now on, when this period of social distancing passes.

Surely there will be break-ups of couples who were together out of sheer inertia or social interests that seem to have lost weight by being subjected to them for so long. Perhaps there will be a change of vision about the «chosen solitude» and the single concept, something that many are proud of, but in both cases, I am sure that a special person will be sought with whom to happily share life, because we humans are naturally sociable beings who need to love and be loved.


Verónica Alcanda  

Expert in Human Resources, founder of Alcanda Matchmaking, the first Matchmaking company in Spain and of Matchmaking Corporation. Creator of the patented scientific method «Head Hunting Sentimental®» which was born to respond to the need to provide a sector, until now poorly regulated, with a rigorous method that offers guarantees of professionalism and ethics to its clients in search of a stable partner.

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